Hello, my friends, welcome back to the Healthy Eating for Busy Women podcast. My name is Kat. I am your host and today we’re gonna talk about the confidence equation. I’m excited. Are you excited? But truly, this is something that will be, it’s a different perspective than I’ve taught on confidence.I’ve mentioned confidence a few times on this podcast, and this is a equation of confidence that is very simple and easy to understand.And it is a concept that has helped hundreds of women I’ve coached get to that next optimal level with their health. Simply because it’s gonna help you stop wasting time and energy on the wrong problems.What is happening right now is so many of you are waiting to feel confident and certain and sure in yourself before you go all in on a health journey. And that is sabotaging your results before you even start.So today I’m going to present an equation of confidence that’s gonna help you make sense of it and make it accessible right now.So you’ll see what I mean as we go through this episode, but make sure you are in a head space where you can really listen to what I’m saying […0.5s] because it can completely change the trajectory of your results.Now the biggest problem that’s happening is that many of you are recycling the same kind of health journey over and over again, right?You’re and off track. And […0.5s] in this, you’re still trying to feel confident. You’re trying to believe you can make progress when really you haven’t provided yourself the evidence yet […0.5s] that that’s the case. And I wanna honor this right now.This doesn’t mean anything has gone massively wrong. But notice if you’re trying to feel confident and certain and stable in your health journey, but you actually haven’t created the evidence that you can create these results yet. Does that make sense?This isn’t a shaming game. It’s just to validate you if you’re feeling unstable and not confident right now. And in this, we can waste a lot of time and energy, and there’s four main ways we do this.Okay, so the first way you can waste time and energy when you’re in this spot is you might be trying to move forward by solving action problems versus your mindset […0.5s] now. This is a very common thing.So many of us who are intellectuals and we love to learn, we’re intelligent, we really are action takers, and we focus on what we need to do versus how we need to change our thinking.One really big example is you might think right now, the issue is not knowing what to eat. Right? So you think that the problem is more what I call top of the pyramid problems to solve for. But the real issue, for example, is that you don’t trust yourself to follow through consistently.You don’t see yourself as someone who eat, who eats healthy. […0.5s] You see yourself in a low regard, which emotionally causes you to feel insecure, inadequate, […0.5s] and shame.This is an identity problem. And there’s a lot of top of pyramid problems and foundational pyramid problems which I talk about in my teachings, but this is an example.You cannot solve for healthy eating and weight loss in your actions unless you solve what’s going on in your mind first. It’s gonna be very difficult for you.Number two, something that keeps you stuck is you’re trying to feel confident and certain in this journey before creating evidence, like I said, right.So what this means is you keep waiting to feel ready, you keep waiting to feel motivated, certain or emotionally clear before you really take your health seriously and your weight loss seriously.So then you’re waiting forever, feeling even more crappy and less confident, because you’re not progressing, right? You’re not creating that evidence that this is something that you can do. This is a backwards approach.You’re trying to do the egg before the chicken, right? Or however that […0.6s] phrase goes, what’s gonna need to happen is confidence is created only after you’ve taken action consistently enough. It is something you earn. It is not something that just happens or is given.So many of you are trying to force confidence when you haven’t created the evidence to prove it yet.Third, a lot of the times, what’s happening is you’re just over consuming a lot of information instead of implementing it.I know those of you who do this, because I am you or I was you. You’re always consuming more concepts, podcast courses, research […0.5s] articles, social media. You guys, it’s too much, it’s analysis paralysis.What I would offer you is you likely already know everything you need to know about food and weight loss to eat healthy and lose weight. Now […0.5s] what you’re missing is behavioral work, which is something that you have to build skills for.It’s not information based, and what I mean, […0.5s] and what you’re gonna Wanna do is just be a better steward of how much information you’re consuming because it takes up brain space. The more brain space that is taken up, […0.5s] the harder it’s going to be to take clear action.So for example, how my clients reset themselves in my process is, so I’ll actually give you guys a quick example of how this can happen even in my programs because this is a behavioral issue.I’ll have clients come in and they go through my very simple four step process on how to master naturally healthy eating.And then what their brain sometimes does is the want to analysis paralysis a little bit. And this actually comes up a lot once we do the body cues work, so you get to a place in the teachings where your cravings have gone down, you don’t experience urgency around food anymore, you’ve done that foundational pyramid work, right?So then the next step is acknowledging your body cues like fullness and then honing that skill where you stop eating when you’re full. Now here’s something that can happen and it’s very sneaky.Occasionally I will have a client who gets stuck here because they’ll say, I’m not losing weight anymore and I need to figure this fullness thing out. So I’m gonna go back to the drawing board back to the learning and I’m gonna learn everything I can about fullness cues.Because something has gone terribly wrong and it’s not working now. This sounds okay, right?This sounds useful. But what I want them to do instead of going back to the learning drawing board is I want them to keep going out in the world and attempting to honor their fullness through actions at their meals, by honing the skill, by actually listening to their body, by writing down the symptoms of how their body feels during their meals. Does this make sense?There is a really big difference between learning in theory, in concepts versus learning in action.And a lot of you guys have hit the threshold of how much you can learn with information, and you haven’t been taking any action, so you actually haven’t produced any experience in the things you’re learning, which keeps you really stuck, and it’s not gonna build confidence.The really interesting thing is you actually can build confidence very quickly when you implement, even if you’re not that great at it yet. Because you’re gonna feel yourself moving forward in the skill building, and you can see yourself building those skills.When you’re just getting lots of information, you’re not gonna be providing evidence that you’re moving forward at all. So I hope that makes sense.It’s very sneaky, but it is so important, you guys. And then a really important last way y’all keep yourself stuck is, and then a really important last way you can waste time and energy is when you avoid the discomfort emotionally that would build confidence for you.So what I mean by this is when you’re waiting to feel confident before you go all in with your health. You’re avoiding emotional discomfort, and here’s the thing embracing emotional discomfort and taking action with discomfort is what builds confidence.This is how confidence is created, and when you avoid feeling uncomfortable when you do things, you actually are never going to become confident, because it’s gonna make you feel kind of helpless and weak, and, you can’t do things.When you do things even though you don’t want to. Little by little over time, it’s gonna build this inner strength and high regard for yourself, which builds confidence.Alright, so this is learning how to play a sport. A lot of you guys unintentionally or mistakenly think, that your problem with healthy eating and weight loss is knowledge.Right, but really, it’s a skill building problem. You just haven’t taken enough action in core skills that create this expertise and this outcome. And it’s really more like learning a sport than it is taking a class.And when you learn a sport, you don’t wanna waste all your time reading books about soccer or basketball or tennis before you pick up the ball and build the muscle memory, right? You want to get in the court or wherever you play, haha, and actually work the muscles to get good at what that thing is.But I want you to imagine that to avoid failing at that sport, because you believe that that shouldn’t happen.All you ever do is research this sport that you wanna play. What we need you to do is to get in that arena or field or court, and we need you to start just taking action because that’s what builds confidence.You will never build confidence knowing how to do something beforehand and being sure that you’re gonna do it. That works when it’s an informational problem or you’re taking a test, right, this is not an informational problem, it’s a skill building problem, and you’re just seeing it the wrong way.You need to understand that you will never feel confident or sure when starting this work, because you’re gonna have to suck it at the beginning, just like you would suck at a sport or anything else that requires scale building.And we have the option to see it that way, or we don’t shame ourselves for being a beginner. Does that make sense?So don’t avoid the discomfort that actually builds confidence, because that’s what’s necessary to get really good at this work, and to create the results with food and body that you want.Now the solution to confidence, cause that’s what we’re talking about is not positive thinking or being more motivated, […0.5s] right.It’s strategically building confidence, and this is solved by understanding what I’m gonna call today the confidence equation. Once you understand this equation, you stop needing to be certain, you stop needing to feel motivated, and you stop fearing failure.This will prevent so much self sabotage, and with this, you’ll also make your success inevitable, because you will become someone who trusts herself to follow through.Alright, so listen very carefully. Here is what confidence is. Confidence equals two things. It equals the belief you can take action even when you don’t feel like it, plus […0.5s] the belief you can create an outcome you want.So I’ll say that again, confidence equals the belief you can 1 take action even when you don’t feel like it, and 2, create an outcome you want.So we’re gonna get into this deeper and […0.5s] make it specific for you, but how this works is that confidence again, it comes from evidence that you create. You create evidence that you can create a result from the actions you take.That actions create your results, and then, so here’s how this works. Confidence comes from evidence You create evidence from action, your action creates results, and your results will then reinforce your confidence over time.So confidence is built brick by brick through action and results you create. And here are some really important clarifications I want you to hear me.True confidence built brick by brick is not dependent on always winning. So when you build a confidence brick and you take action and you get on the court or the field, so to speak with your healthy eating and weight loss skills, it is not dependent on you succeeding at that thing. It just requires you to keep showing up even when you don’t want to.It just requires actions and producing an outcome. Your confidence does not disappear the second you fail.And if it does, that was not confidence, that was probably motivation or willpower. Confidence is knowing even if I fail today, I will still keep showing up. And that is how I know the result is inevitable. That is what confidence is. Confidence is not fearing failure and trying to avoid failure.And this is what so many of you think confidence is, is being certain that you’re gonna succeed no matter what. No confidence is knowing you’re gonna create the result no matter what, which is not dependent on wins or failures.Confidence, if we relate it to the sports analogy, is believing that you will get skilled at the sport, regardless if you win or lose a game at any given moment, or you make the basket or don’t make the basket.Clearly, I’m not a sports person, haha. But […0.5s] this needs to be seen from a skillbuilding perspective, because so many of you are chasing the feeling of certainty that you can’t fail.And that is why you are stuck when this is the type of confidence you’re chasing. You think it comes from doing things right, and then you over prepare, you over consume information.And the confidence you need is just knowing you’re gonna keep showing up no matter what, and taking action, you’re gonna keep doing your best to produce the results you want, even if you fail. That is the quality of confidence we wanna establish here.So let’s talk about how to build this confidence in day to day life. And here is a process that will create that lasting confidence, whether that’s with food, weight loss or your health.If you allow this to be simple, your results will be inevitable. You will feel more confident now. But I want you to take this and apply it to you, because here’s what you’re gonna do.The first thing is you’re gonna decide what result you’re creating and how you will do it. So let’s say weight loss. So the first thing you’re gonna do is decide what result you’re creating and how you’re gonna do it.So for example, let’s say you decide this week I am gonna plan on stopping my meals when I’m full. You decide what you’re gonna do and how you’ll do it, so you stop indulging confusion and hobbying and over researching. You’re no longer someone who sees this as a hobby. You’re someone who embodies it by making decisions.And you are going to firmly decide what you’re gonna implement to create this result now, no fluff.All right, after that number two, you are going to expect discomfort in following through, and you’re gonna acknowledge it when it comes up. So for example, let’s say you then experience doubt when you think about honoring your fullness this week.You’re like, I don’t believe I’ll follow through with it. I’m going to overeat. I always fall off track. That’s doubt, and when you have this doubt that says this won’t work, you need to acknowledge it. Don’t indulge in it, don’t ruminate in it and indulge in that story, right?Instead, name it, say I am experiencing discomfort in my body, I am having resistance and normalize emotional discomfort on the path to the results you want. Because emotional discomfort is part of the process, and you are naming something that is supposed to be there.So would you so expect discomfort, normalize it and acknowledge it when it comes up, then you’re gonna take action before you feel confident.Alright, this is the skill take action before you feel confident. Once you have named the discomfort, you’ve slowed down, and you’ve acknowledged it. This puts you in a better position to take action even when it’s there. Because so many of you aren’t […0.5s] doing things when you feel uncomfortable, cause you’re not leaning back and acknowledging the discomfort.Acknowledging the discomfort is what allows your body to breathe it out and process it. So then you’re gonna take action even when you feel uncomfortable and after you’ve acknowledged it. So for this example, you’re gonna start showing up to honorfulness, even though you doubt you will.Make sense. You’re gonna do it, even though you don’t think you will. You’re gonna show up and do your best. You’re not gonna throw in the towel and just avoid the work. And so in the example of sports, right, you’re gonna still show up to practice, even though you think you’ll suck at it.And this is how confidence is earned by showing up and taking continuous action to build the skills, even when you think you will not do it successfully. Once you’ve taken action before you feel confident no matter what.Now you’re gonna start creating results, which is what we want now we’re gonna have output, and whether you create the outcomes you want in how you showed up, you’re creating results. So for example, let’s say you decided to honor your fullness this week.That’s what you’re gonna focus on. You’re gonna process that discomfort, and you’re gonna start taking that action. Now you’re going to measure the results for that week. Maybe you wanna see if you lost weight or didn’t lose weight or gained weight, whatever.When you create, here’s the thing about this situation, whether you created in this case, the weight loss you want, now you are actively creating results from a leadership position because we can measure it, we can evaluate it. So you’re implementing and creating results you can move forward with, and this will build confidence and maturity.So let’s say, so you guys can see what I mean in this example, the result created is that you implemented honoring your fullness, and you didn’t lose weight. Let’s say you didn’t create the result you wanted.You’re then gonna go to the next step, which is evaluating that objectively. So whether you win or whether you fail, that is data that you will use to move forward next week even better.Something that my clients learn in my program is we evaluate very masterfully and is we evaluate very intricately, and I teach you how to do that.Whether a client creates the result they want that week or not, they get all the information they need to keep moving forward similar to a sport, right? Whether you did really well during practice or you didn’t, you exactly what you need to work on to get further next week.And so wins or failures, all we need you to do is make decisions, take responsibility for what you’re working on, and then implement it to the best of your ability, regardless of the output created or not, right.So then we can actually know what it is you need to work on, so use that data to move forward even better. This example is perfect, cause let’s say you attempt to honor your fullness, and then you still don’t lose weight.That is the result, so then when you evaluate, you hypothesize that maybe you’re honoring your fullness too late. What you thought was honoring your fullness maybe is still overeating, so you decide to try differently next week. Simple, not complicated, not personal.But I want you guys to see what I mean. If this sounds very basic and boring, it’s because it is, but what has been holding you back from letting it be this simple is waiting to feel confident and sure and motivated before taking this type of action.And you can feel confident on the way to the results you want, but it requires you to take action in this way even when you aren’t hitting the Mark yet. And in the beginning, you will not hit the Mark, my friends. You have to fail in order to build the skill.So for example, in this example, right, this person doesn’t create the weight loss result they wanted, but that gives them the ability to hypothesize what their problem area is, and how they’re gonna work on it next week.So many of you guys are trying to make improvements and create the health you want, but you’re not actually creating […0.5s] outputs and results that you can work with. You’re not creating evidence to actually take data from and use it to inform your progress moving forward.And then the last thing you’re gonna do with all of this is maybe obvious. You just repeat this process until the desired outcome is created. You keep deciding, implementing and evaluating until you create that outcome you want.This is how confidence becomes unshakeable. You will never look, you no longer need to indulge worry, doubt, spin out about your results with your body, because through repetition and evidence, you’ve established that you know how to create results, whether you win or lose in any given scenario.And […0.6s] an analogy of confidence, y’all may have heard me use is the example of pouring a glass of water, right, so most of y’all are probably confident about pouring a glass of water, and that means that even if you miss the glass when pouring it, you don’t question whether you know how to pour a glass of water.That is actually what confidence is. It’s not you never missing the glass. This is what you guys think confidence is gonna look like, is when you’re 100% sure that you have fixed your human error, and you’re never gonna fail again.No confidence is where you’ve created enough evidence that failure is okay, and that actually being willing to show up and pour the glass of water is what’s gonna make you inevitably masterful at it. Does that make sense?It’s such a silly analogy, but it really does apply. The goal of all of this is just for you guys to stop wasting time and energy convincing yourself to be confident. Okay, you can’t convince yourself to be confident. You have to create enough evidence that, that is accessible to you, and you can do this now. This is something you can control.All it requires of you is to make decisions, take action on those decisions to the best of your ability, win or fail, and then evaluate objectively the results you create.That is it. And I know this isn’t always easy because you’re gonna have discomfort there. You’re gonna have shame telling you you shouldn’t have messed up again. You’re gonna have doubt saying this is never gonna work.I get it. I’ve had all those things too. And I still have those things. But if you can learn how to observe your emotions from the outside and name them, and actually stop making them personal, you will be able to do this. And so […0.5s] you will not have all of this resistance holding you back. And it is a skill in itself to do all of this.So go easy on yourself, have patience, but show up to this work today. Because all you need to do is create evidence that you are someone who does show up. That is it, and that is a decision you can make. And here’s the big reasons why this is so worth your time to create this strategic confidence.You’re gonna restore so much time and energy, cause the first thing is you stop obsessing over whether you’re over, whether you’ll fail or succeed. Because, failures don’t determine your outcome showing up does.This is where my clients really start to build momentum, and their result skyrocket is the moment I see they understand […0.5s] that failure doesn’t determine their result showing up does.And the more you can just show up to a process of learning without making it personal, whether you win or you fail along the way, your results will just skyrocket. Your results will just excel like crazy.Also, you’re gonna stop spiraling every time you overeat, or you don’t lose weight, because you know how to move forward from setbacks even better than before. So many of you, it’s not that failure is what’s preventing you from the result you want.It’s that every time you fail, you think something’s gone horribly wrong. So in other words, every time you show up to play a sport, and you don’t make the basket, you walk off, cause you’re like, might as well not even try. No, we just need you to keep taking action and building those skills.And another thing this is gonna help with so much is you’ll stop needing motivation to do anything necessary to create your results, because, you can handle discomfort.You know, how confidence is actually created and creating strategic confidence. Once you start laying down those bricks, it is unshakable. No failure can bring that down, and it is so worth your time. Because the truth is you guys mastering the skill of naturally healthy eating weight loss personal growth. It is 10% learning and 90% implementation every single time.Confidence is not Learned intellectually, it is Learned behaviorally, no exceptions. And this means if you do not have the results you want now, chances are you are not taking enough action guaranteed.And so what if you want help executing this process in real time, that is what we do in my membership, highly recommend getting inside. It’s$79 a month.You can start today, and you will see results quickly as soon as you join. Because it’s about strategy, my loves. It is not about […0.5s] needing motivation or willpower or anything that’s gonna exhaust you. It is accessible right now.So my hope is that today’s episode gave you something to apply today. I hope you got golden nuggets from today’s episode as well that get you unstuck with wherever you’re at right now. I love y’all so much. Thank you for being here. I will talk to you next week.