Hello, my friends, welcome back to the Healthy Eating for Busy Women podcast. My name is Kat. I am your host and I am very excited to talk about today’s episode. We are going to really deep dive into how to be a foodie or someone who genuinely loves the eating experience […0.5s] and lose weight.And these can feel like conflicting concepts, but I’m here today to break […0.5s] all of those preconceptions and to really change your relationship to this area. But before we get into today’s episode, I have something very important to talk about.So if you are not in the know or you haven’t seen the announcement, there is something I have been working on behind the scenes for quite […0.6s] a while now. And I have officially announced a brand new experience for this year called Forever Body […0.5s] the mastermind.So what? This is, this is nothing I’ve ever offered before. This is a six month coaching container, and it’s going to be for a very small group of women, so only 10 of you […0.6s] who are ready to move into the next level […0.5s] of health.So this is for those of you who have made changes and you have seen some positive transformation in your life, but, you’re not reaching your full potential of who you could be, […0.5s] the level of health you could have, the weight loss you could have, you’re really looking for something a bit more intensive and high level. That is exactly what forever body is. And I think what’s gonna make this so effective is how we’re gonna kick it off.So how we will start is with first time I’m ever doing this, It’s a live in person event on Amelia Island here in Florida. It’s absolutely beautiful here and it’s gonna be super immersive.So what’s gonna happen is you’re gonna fly in and then we’re gonna spend a few days together in a private beach home, on the island doing deep personalized coaching work.So this is gonna be very intensive and you’re […0.5s] not, you are going to leave a completely different person than when you got there. That is the purpose of an experience like this. And we’re going to […0.5s] set the direction and do all the learning before the six months even start.And then what’s gonna happen is y’all will fly home, have all these new connections, understand exactly what to do. And then we’re gonna mastermind each week and coach each week over the six months. So it’s incredibly effective and it’s going to be super transformational.And here’s what you need to know now. Applications for this mastermind will open on April 6th. And because, again, this is such a small curated space, there’s only 10 spots available.So if this is something you’re hearing right now and you’re like, this is exactly what I need, there is a gap you are looking to fill […0.5s] in this area of your life, then this is gonna be the way to do that.So the best thing you can do right now to get all the details and be ready when applications open is to join the waitlist for it. You can click on the link in the show notes. It’s gonna take you there and I cannot wait to kick off this experience with those of you who […0.5s] are the right fit for it. It’s going to be absolutely […0.5s] incredible. So, okay, get into today’s episode.First when we think about losing weight while being a foodie. We’ve kind of define what a foodie actually is. And as far as I know, this is not an official Webster’s dictionary term.Haha. It’s more of, um, term we use to identify as someone who really loves food. But here’s how I personally define it when it comes to our work here.I define being a foodie as someone who is unwilling to compromise enjoyment with food to achieve their optimal health. And I want you guys to know that I am this person. You might be this person, and this is not a bad thing. In fact, I think this will highly serve you to be someone who’s not willing to compromise enjoying food for optimal health. There’s a lot of morally superior, […0.5s] um, people or information out there that will say, no, you, should be willing to sacrifice anything to be healthy. And I personally don’t think it’s valuable to offer that perspective or to live by that perspective, because then all you’re gonna be doing is feeling pressured, neglected, and deprived.Today I want you to really understand how you can be a foodie and prioritize enjoyment with food […0.5s] and have optimal health, because they can come together those two things.So this is actually, this perspective is so responsible for what has shaped my coaching philosophy, my process, my expertise over the years. Because this is how I built my personal transformation early on for myself. I set the standard that I was not going to budge when it came to being a foodie.I remember really […0.5s] having a lot of experience and doing a lot of research with the […0.5s] options that were available at the time with dieting and weight loss and all these things. And I realized that none of them matched the type of relationship or energy I wanted to have with food. And not in the spiritual way, but really practically, I was like, there’s gotta be a way to supremely enjoy food in this really indulgent way and have that fulfillment and also be optimally healthy. Which meant at the time, I knew I needed to hone in on and understand how pleasure with food actually worked, what play with food actually could look like as someone who wanted optimal health and my ideal body.So here’s the holdup you might be having, which is very common and understandable. You might have the belief that in order to be a foodie, to identify as a foodie, you cannot be an optimally healthy person, that you will have to sacrifice that. And what I’m not going to sell you on here is that you’re gonna be a foodie in a way who just enjoys, um, salads and dry bland protein sources.Okay, not what we’re saying. When I say foodie, I still genuinely do mean a person who tries new things when you go to a restaurant, maybe it’s your idea of fun […0.5s] going out and, um, something new or bonding over eating experiences. Maybe you’re the most indulgent one at the table when you go out socially and with friends and you really value the taste, textures and kind art of food.And here’s what I want you to know, there’s a low level way to be a foodie and there’s a high level way to be a foodie.And I don’t mean this in terms of our self worth or inherent value or in a performative way. I is a difference between identifying as a foodie in a way where you hold yourself in low regard and feel helpless with foods you love. And alternatively, there’s a way to view yourself as a foodie in a way that’s in a high regard, so in a way that’s indulgent, luxurious, calm, present, there’s a more mature and stable way to go about being a foodie. Is what I’m saying, and that’s what I want you to see today.And I wanna talk about what it looks like to move into that persona, because there’s some changes you’re gonna have to make, and most of that is going to be a mindset shift for you.And when I say maturing with your eating habits, I always wanna tell you guys, this is not to be patronizing or infantilizing to ourselves.Maturing in any area is just a skill we all have to learn. Even you, who I’m assuming if you’re listening to this podcast that you’re pretty intellectual. You probably love to learn, and I’m guessing you’re a good problem solver.Even you, who I know is supremely capable of creating the optimal health you need to build the skill of maturity with your eating habits.I certainly did, and I still am constantly a student of that. And that is okay. We wanna normalize that because when I talk about maturing with your eating habits, much of that is emotional maturity, which means we stop making decisions with food reactively from a child side and more proactively from an adult […0.5s] parenting side. So we must learn to parent the child side of our brain when it comes to food, and especially when it comes to food enjoyment.So again, a low level foodie, which I know sounds ridiculous, but we’re gonna use these terms today.A low level foodie is being a, let’s say child with food without any parenting. So this is when we’re enjoying food without any boundaries intense or healthy constraints that keep you and your goals safe. So it’s like a child running around with no supervision, and they don’t know that putting their hand on the stove will burn them that situation, right? We don’t love that a high level foodie, um, say it’s not […0.6s] getting rid of that child part of you that wants to play with food, enjoy, have fun.All it is, is providing that part of you with a parent that can kind her and create boundaries that keep her and her health stable within that experience.Do you see what I’m getting at here with this analogy? So the best the low level foodie experience gets, which is a term in my teachings, is not a parent, but a fun aunt that watches over them. So this is very, um, to the low level foodie experience where we have a fun aunt approach to it.And I tell you guys to, I am a fun aunt in real life, so I’m not bringing down the ants here, haha. But I imagine this fun aunt persona. They just care about the fun with the child, right?They’re not really there to parent or pay attention to the child’s well being as much. And they don’t wanna be the bad guy or tell the child no or have negative experiences with the child, right? They just want the child to be happy.So what do we do a lot when we’re in this low level foodie experience with fun aunt and child?The fun aunt indulges and pities the child a little bit and they say, okay, love, whatever you want, even if those eating decisions are ultimately a detriment […0.5s] to the child’s health. So that’s kind I want you to see this low level foodie example here.We’re not parenting, we’re kind […0.6s] anting. Um, let’s say a child, which a child is supposed to do cause it’s a child, tries candy and says, wow, this tastes good. I wanna have this every single day. I love candy, candy loves me.And the fun aunt sees herself more like a friend to the child than a parent maybe. So she says, yes, that’s so fun, let’s do this together. We don’t even have to tell your parents, you deserve to have fun. You’ve, had a long day, you need a break, you deserve this, right?So all those excuses we have that get us to eat unhealthy when we know better, this is kind the fun aunt talks to the child. And we will have these excuses every day with foods that we love, and that will end up driving your relationship to them, which, by the way, you guys, this is why a lot of you think that more unhealthy play foods are negative because of the approach you take with them.If you parent yourself properly around those foods, they’re not a problem, right?So this is why a lot of you are identifying as a foodie from an unstable immature childlike relationship to making those foodie decisions. So you’re deciding to indulge, eat foods you love from the reasoning that you just have to have it, that you just need a break.It’s from that fun and pity, and it’s, feels very immature and unstable, right? It doesn’t feel good. The food tastes good in the moment, but after you’re filled with regret and frustration and confusion, cause you don’t have the health you want.And so we’re gonna keep this analogy going, haha. And we wanna know that in this scenario, it’s not […0.5s] the child who needs to necessarily change because they just wanna enjoy the food. It’s not the child’s fault, it’s the fault of the role who was supposed to be parenting. Does this make sense?So a lot of us will feel like we need to shame the part of us that just wants to indulge in fun eating experiences, will have these judgments of ourselves that were out of control, that we shouldn’t crave food that much. And you’ll think you need to get rid of that child part of yourself to have the results you want, which is why a lot of you think you can’t be a foodie and get the results you want. It’s why you try and force that part of you away through willpower, um, diet regimens, other things.But really, what I want you to know is you don’t have to get rid of this part of yourself that really enjoys food and has this childlike quality.All you need to do is start adding a parent role into the mix for yourself in your own brain. And you need to notice where the fun and role is happening that is, […0.5s] not allowing you to be a parent to yourself.So let’s go back to this pretend scenario, and the child says, oh my gosh, I love the candy, candy loves me, so I wanna have this every day. I imagine the parent saying, um, I imagine the parent not saying, no, that’s unhealthy, you shouldn’t have that, right?They don’t shut it down. Maybe they say, yeah, is so good, let’s have some together, but let’s be selective when we really enjoy this, because too much isn’t gonna feel good. It’s not something we want cause we wanna be healthy, you guys.The child will agree when you parent properly. It doesn’t mean you’re not gonna have urges to […0.5s] eat unhealthy or have more candy when you don’t need it in the scenario. It just means that you will notice as you have this relationship to that child part of you.There will be moments when the child genuinely agrees. Because what’s happening as well is many of you aren’t giving this kind of child part of you, which is really just your wants and values an opportunity to agree to eating healthier or moderating how you eat, play foods in this way.Because you’re not approaching her as a parent. You’re approaching her, um, a drill sergeant who’s demanding more, or you’re pitying her from that finance perspective. Make sense.So this is deeper work, and I know this might be a lot right now, I’m giving you a lot of info and a lot of coaching concepts, um, if you just take 10% of what I’m saying here, and you relate to it, it will start changing the game for you.So here’s the reality with moving into, kind high level foodie persona, where you can be a foodie and have the weight loss and body you want.It is not all fun and games. There is growth involved here, of course, right, because can you be a foodie and achieve your ideal weight, optimal health?Yes, you can. My women are doing it all the time, creating these results every day. But what I want you to know is that has to start with creating a high level experience as a foodie by including that parent role and leaving behind the low level foodie persona.I’m, just dying right now that we’re calling it high level foodie it’s so ridiculous. But part of all of this, you guys […0.5s] is being willing to process the potential tantrums of the child.Okay, have a child brain, that’s what a child brain does, because we need to understand that it is not the job of the child part of our brain to behave like an adult. They can’t, a child, they’re not supposed to […0.6s] very primitive.So sometimes what happens when the parent says, no, we’re not gonna have more candy right now, we don’t need it, we’re gonna feel sick, we don’t want that. What happens is the child, which again represents the primitive brain, will potentially feel the emotion of deprivation.So to be clear, in my practice, deprivation is not actually withholding something or restricting something the child needs in this scenario, it’s the child, part of us having a perfectly natural and healthy […0.5s] emotional experience that a child would have.So in this case, when the child has a tantrum because we take something away, that’s not good for it. The child and you and I are gonna have to learn to process emotional deprivation in order to learn mature boundaries with food. Okay?Exactly like what happens with a child or a toddler. Maybe the child internally will say, but I need that candy, I have to have it. Maybe we’ll want to kick and scream a little bit.And the fun and part of us might appease the child every now and again and say, okay, have the candy. Don’t cry just have the candy. You deserve it.And this is related to the times when we just come home from work or we wanna veg out and we’re like, yeah, okay, I just need this right now. And then we over […0.6s] eat.But then what does that internal child learn? That part of our brain that every time they feel emotional discomfort and they feel deprived, candy will fix it in this analogy or food will fix it. They don’t learn emotional processing, regulation and maturity in this area.So now what’s gonna happen is we’re going to start practicing emotional maturity, which is just a skill.Doesn’t mean we need to shame ourselves for starting at square one with this. You guys, nobody is doing this. So even just the fact that you’re listening to this podcast episode means you’re a thousand leagues ahead of the rest of the world who’s not practicing the skill of emotional maturity in this area.So know that right for today, what I want you to know, so when the child in you says, I need that candy and, you not time to have more candy […0.5s] or food, in whatever case, you’re going to expect emotional deprivation and you’re going to practice approaching it mentally as the parent.Maybe this means you give that child part of you context in that moment and think, okay, know what? This will make me feel worse. This actually will not help, or maybe that’s not what’s available and it’s not even time for a logical conversation.And what the child part of you needs to do is just process, processing the desperation, the frustration, the deprivation. When you withhold something that is not good for you, you exhale in your body, you lean back, you teach that child part of you that, that emotion is safe to feel.It is okay to want something and to choose to not have it because it’s not good for you. That is what we’re processing, and it’s okay to start at square one with teaching our emotional state that this is safe.Imagine what would happen if that was the skill you focused on. So for today, I know my loves, this is deeper work. Don’t get overwhelmed. Don’t be confused. This is a healing process. So again, even if you took away a little something from today’s episode, it is going to help you.I hope parts of it related to you. And again, […0.5s] if you want the ultimate, transformational experience in this area, and you want to leave behind dabbling with your health, and you wanna move into becoming […0.6s] that optimally healthy version of yourself, the Forever Body Mastermind is the place where you’re gonna wanna do that. So make sure you go to the link in the description. You get on the waitlist and be ready for applications when they open April 6th. 10 spots available. I can’t wait to meet you in person.It is going to be so fun. I cannot even tell you. I have so many fun things planned. Alright, so I love you all so, so and I will talk to you soon.