Hello, my friends. Welcome back to the Healthy Eating for Busy Women podcast. I am your host, Kat and I’m so happy you are here. So […0.5s] if you are new to my work, welcome. I am here to help you make healthy eating more accessible and easier. And I really focus on helping you […0.5s] become a naturally healthy eater. So I don’t want you to just change your external environment with tracking, planning and prepping to eat healthy. I want you to really feel like a naturally healthy eater. So that is what I am here to help you do.And let’s just get into it for today, we’re going to talk about […0.5s] your weight loss focus. And really this topic can shift something really important when it comes to permanent results because we’re gonna be talking about what your direction, what your focus is when it comes to eating healthy and losing weight.And it actually is your focus that will determine whether this is something you keep up with long term or whether it’s something that you’re gonna start and stop again over and over. So no pressure, right? But really quick, I want to ask for a tiny favor.So if you have listened to this podcast, and you enjoy it, you like it, you’ve gotten a little something from it.If you could do me a huge favor and just leave a 5 star review with something that helped you in the description of that review, just to let the podcast player you use and other people know that this is a useful podcast that can help, and it helps this podcast get seen by other women who would benefit from it. So if you do that, thank you in advance. I really appreciate it.So […0.5s] your weight loss focus here is something that a lot of women come to me with. So we’re gonna talk about this first, and then this will get into why this relates to your focus for weight loss.A lot of women come to me and they tell me, cat, I really just need to be more consistent with healthy eating. That’s the problem. I just need to focus on […0.5s] doing it right, doing it more and executing each day, because I always fall off track.Now what I wanna offer you right off the bat today is the heavy hitter that […0.6s] you’re not saying you need to be more consistent. What you’re really saying is I need to prove that I’m doing it right everyday.So stay with me. We’re not saying that you do not need to make healthy eating decisions to lose weight. But I really want you to consider […0.5s] what it means to be consistent.And let’s just ask ourselves that question real quick. What do I mean by being consistent? What I can tell you, having coached many women, including myself over many years, is that we all have a different definition of consistency, which is interesting, right.So some of you might think every day, some of you might think every week, some of you might equate consistency with never overeating or never not hitting a calorie count. But it’s a broad statement, right? I just need to be more consistent.And what I wanna offer is what we’re really saying is I just need to know I’m doing the right things. We have this kind of metric, we need to reach each day to feel like we’re gonna create the result.Now here’s what I wanna offer you. If you’re thinking I just need to be more, consistent or disciplined or whatever it is, that is gonna create pressure, right?So let’s do a check in. I want you to think, or I want you to consider when you think I just need to be more consistent with healthy eating.How would that feel energetically for you? Does it feel useful and done and complete, or does it feel like some pressure, some uncertainty? Maybe it even presents as hopefulness, I hope I can be consistent, but what I want you to see is how that […0.5s] focus of needing consistency probably doesn’t feel stable to you.It doesn’t feel sure, it doesn’t feel solvable, and it does not feel done. I need to be consistent with healthy eating, sounds productive, but what I want to help you see today is that focus is usually about emotions and not […0.6s] results. So results include how you wanna eat, results you want with your body weight loss, feeling healthier.All those things emotions have to do with wanting to feel proud, accomplished and successful. Emotions also have to do with not wanting to feel certain emotions. So you want to avoid feeling behind or inadequate, or like you’re failing.So many of us have a weight loss focus of needing to be consistent. And what’s sneaky about it is actually we want to feel a certain way, or we don’t wanna feel a certain way.We wanna be consistent, so we can feel accomplished and successful. And we […0.5s] don’t wanna not be consistent, cause we don’t wanna feel inadequate, we’re falling behind, or we’re failing.This is very sneaky, y’all, when it comes to the human brain, and what I want you to see, even if you just see it a little bit, is where your brain isn’t solving for weight loss, the focus is on solving for self worth.Alright. It’s a very different focus and it will create very different results. So this just needs to take shape right now, but in this podcast, it will continue to make more sense.Now […0.5s] there is a difference between focusing on how you feel about a weight loss journey versus focusing on the weight loss you want to create. So I’ll say that again, there’s a difference between focusing on how you want to feel during weight loss versus focusing on the result you want to create.So let’s consider a situation where your focus is, I want to lose X pounds. And your brain has an ability to solve for this as a scientist. It can evaluate from curiosity, what’s working, what’s not working? What can I try next?It feels resourceful, right? So this is a results based focused. This is clean. It allows for flexibility, experimentation and progress […0.6s] even if you’re not consistent.So I want you to picture a scientist working on an experiment. Do we think that their focus is consistency, consistent results, consistent actions, […0.5s] right? What a scientist would know and why they would never focus on that’s not how you figure out […0.5s] the results of an experiment. That’s not how you figure out what works.So why that’s not the focus, and I want you to see how, if your […0.5s] focus with weight loss and healthy eating is to be consistent and to do it right every day, you’re not gonna be experimenting. You’re not gonna be learning new things, and it probably will feel like you’re pushing up against a wall, hoping it will one day work.The most successful clients of mine or women who become naturally healthy eaters aren’t the most perfect. And I want you guys to know that your high level results will not require perfection or perhaps consistency in the way you’re attached to. It will require you to be resourceful. And I want to offer you that you cannot have a focus on consistency and have a focus on being resourceful because for a lot of us, a focus on consistency is doing the same things every day to get a result. And that’s not sustainable and it might be available for a season, but it’s not gonna be available for the rest of our lives. We do not well resource ourselves when that is the focus.So my […0.5s] most successful clients who completely change the way they eat, they become a naturally healthy eater.Here’s what happens. They fail fast, they learn faster, and they do not make failure mean anything about them. And if their brain does make it mean something about them, […0.5s] they practice processing that so they do not sabotage.They keep the focus on the result, not on their emotions of not feeling good enough, feeling behind or like they should be doing it right. Does that make sense?This can be very sneaky. So what we want to do is we want to make sure your weight loss focus is on the solvable result. As a scientist where you’re being resourceful, and that is the focus, not as the student mentality where you wanna do it.Right, so you don’t get it wrong. It is sneaky. It is what we coach on in, on your eating habits, my membership extensively.So if this is connecting with you, I highly recommend you get coaching on it. It is gonna help you so much. So […0.5s] let’s talk about a visual that I really love to offer and hang with me here, cause it’s gonna sound kind of ominous and weird, haha.So I want you to imagine that you’re in a completely dark room, and somewhere across the room is a doorway that leads the result you want.And let’s say that door is eating healthy, a weight loss goal, whatever it is. That’s a door you want to get to and you happen to have a flashlight. But the flashlight only lights up the very next step in front of you.So you cannot see the whole room, you can’t see the door, you can’t see a to Z you can only see a to B so here’s what happens next, and there are two ways you can go with this.So first, I wanna talk about what a perfectionist does in the situation, which is a lot of us, okay, a perfectionist does is a perfectionist will refuse to take a step forward until she knows exactly where the door is, right because she wants to do the right thing.So she insists that she needs all the light on, and she stays frozen in her fear of failure, because any messed up in the wrong direction would mean to her that she’s doing it wrong.So eventually she […0.5s] convinces herself that it’s not working, nothing’s gonna work for her, all because of the relationship. She has to taking a step and then evaluating and seeing where she’s at.So the perfectionist waits until she knows […0.5s] the right way. So she’s hoping the lights will turn on and she can see the door, which never will happen. And that’s the entire […0.6s] reason why this podcast is happening today.I want you guys to know that this perfectionistic version of this result that you guys are attached to is not going to happen.No one’s gonna turn on all the lights and say this is the guarantee direction you need to go in order to open your door. Yes, there are processes and steps that can help with that.I have a process in my program, but at the end of the day for you to figure out how it’s gonna work for you. You need to be willing to find the door with the flashlight that you have and take one step at a time.So, okay, let’s talk about the other persona which rather than a perfectionist, it’s a resourceful woman. It is someone who is coming up with solutions and always makes it work.So here’s what that version of us does. She takes a step. Alright, so we have the flashlight in front of us. We do not see that as a problem.And we take a step, we take action, we move forward, and maybe at some point we’ll bump into a wall, actually almost guaranteed because what’s the likelihood that we’re gonna find the door on the first try?But instead of spiraling into our emotions about it, this version of us says, okay, isn’t the way, good to know.She turns, takes another step, and then another and every misstep gives her data, every detour teaches her something about where the door is. And she moves closer to the door every time, not because she was perfect and got it right, but because she just kept moving.So this is how […0.6s] your concrete success of weight loss will work by having the right focus.You do not need the lights on in the dark room. You do not need the full map of how this is gonna work for you in your skill building. You just need to keep holding the flashlight and taking the next step and stay focused on experimenting rather than doing it right every time.So […0.5s] the resourceful version of us take steps forward and eventually will walk into the wall.But when that happens, when we walk into the wall, here’s how a perfectionist would think. A perfectionist would walk into the wall and think, I failed, I walked further away from the door. That’s the lens she has, […0.6s] the lens of a resourceful woman has the lens.I just Learned which way to go and now I’m closer to finding the door, which is the facts that is the truth. So I want you to really see here how your focus is everything.Are you having a focus as a perfectionist and you are attached to consistency doing it right, feeling like, you working, you going towards the door.Or are you having the mentality as a scientist, a resourceful woman who knows that in taking action, those are the steps, the data we need to figure out where that door is. Does that make sense? I hope this analogy is landing and gives you this visual because this is how it really, works.My friends, I have coached hundreds of women throughout the years. I know I say that a lot, but why I tell you this is so much of us with this work, we’ll have this mentality that were uniquely flawed and that were special and that, oh, you doorway, we must never be able to find it because there’s something wrong with me.All the human brains are thinking that and it’s never true. The only thing that’s happening is you are having a personal relationship to going the wrong way, to going into the wall and not going to the door right away. When we can switch the focus to a results based focus that will allow us to cleanly take steps and figure out what works for you.And this can be hard. Emotions will come up. So again, get that coaching support, join on your eating habits. If you want to do that, we start off at$79 a month. You can get in there today, start the course […0.5s] and make that progress. So go to countdown. Com forward slash membership to join, and you can join our community and we will support you.Okay, let’s just walk through a common example of this so you can have it. Let’s just say you overeat. Let’s just say you over ate during the weekend. So this would be our equivalent of walking, then going into the wall, we didn’t get to the door. So your old pattern, your perfectionistic pattern might be, I failed again, I’m not being consistent.I’m further away from my weight loss because I’ve hit this obstacle. So you’re making it mean something about you. You shut down and then you start over […0.5s] on Monday or with a new plan, whatever it is, […0.5s] feeling pressure but convincing yourself, I just need to go the right way this time. That’s how you solve this problem now.Let’s say you over eat during a weekend, and instead your focus is the result, not your self worth, but the result.So imagine now you ask I over age, why do I think that happened? What could I learn from that experience? What is available for me here to see? What could I try differently next time knowing this information? How could I better help myself succeed? Now you have answers, you’re no longer in a spiral.Everything is solvable, you have the very next steps because, […0.5s] yes, we might be attached from this perfectionistic place to have all the answers, to know where the door is.But I want you guys to know you will perpetually suffer so much more if you’re not taking steps forward. The suffering involved with not taking any steps is way higher than the suffering involved in failure when your brain is judging you and making it personal.So it sounds very cliche, but it’s like, choose your suck, you know how sometimes we get those Pinterest quotes that tell us that, yeah, your suck. I recommend choosing the cleaner suck, which we can process of taking steps forward and processing those feelings of failure route.Because at least then we’re creating results, and we’re healing, and we’re processing, and you will not suffer forever if you have the courage to do that. What will keep us stagnant and in long term? Suffering is waiting for the lights to turn on, and waiting for us to have all the answers.Okay, the question isn’t I wanna offer how do I stay consistent with healthy eating so I can lose weight.The question is how do I keep myself moving towards the weight loss I want, even when it feels messy, even when it feels like I’m going the wrong direction, even when it feels like I’m not doing it right.When your focus is on the result, you are able to get creative, you adapt, you become this high level version of yourself that figures it out. You’re gonna develop more self trust. You’re gonna see yourself in a higher regard.So […0.6s] I want you to consider what are you solving for right now without judgment, without shame, but just from understanding and love. Have you been solving for your self worth and trying to make sure you do it right and never fail, or […0.5s] have you been solving for your goal? We’re all human, so know that we will always have that part of our brain that wants to remain stagnant and adds the pressure, but we can learn to soften that and process that. So she’s not holding you back.And that means to start making decisions to take action as a scientist today. And take action for the reasons of the goal, not our self worth. Right? So love y’all, hope this was helpful. If you want structure to solving for this, make sure you go to catrentus.Com forward slash membership. That’s where you can […0.5s] join my membership called Owner Eating Habits again$79. You join, you start the process, you learn how to evaluate these results as a scientist, so you can become that naturally healthy eater and lose weight for the last time.I’ve got you, okay. Appreciate you more than you know. Thank you for listening and I’ll talk to you next week. […0.5s][…0.5s]