Hello, my dear friends. Welcome back to the Healthy Eating for Busy Women podcast. I’m happy you’re here.I’m happy you found time in your very busy schedule to sit with me and learn some things. Reflect on where you’re at in your healthy eating and weight loss journey. And if you’re new here, I am so happy you found this podcast and whatever little corner of internet or social media […0.6s] you found it. And my name is Kat and I’m focused on helping healthy eating feel more accessible to you so you can lose weight for that last time. If you’re unaware of my background and this is your first time here, I have spent the past almost decade helping very type a ambitious, intellectual women […0.6s] reach this goal. And I was someone who knew all the right things to eat, had all of the knowledge and, the intellect and […0.6s] problem solving to reach this weight loss goal or so I thought. And I just struggled for so long. And so I really have devoted my work and this podcast to filling the gaps in terms of why that might be the case for you, why you feel like you’re so smart and so successful, but you still haven’t been able to lose that weight. And, today’s episode will be something where, it will touch on a very specific area of this and it will especially relate to you if you are someone who is ambitious and you know how to work hard, but you’re just not losing weight.And as you’ve seen, the title of today’s episode is, is Weight Loss Harder for you?Which is such a charming and positive title, right? But I really want to speak to those of you […0.6s] who, believe that weight loss is gonna be harder for you because of something to do with […0.5s] your body or your health.So maybe you think because of your age, it’s gonna be harder for you. Maybe you consider yourself older and that comes up in your mind. Maybe your, genetics, your hormones, your metabolism, maybe you’re going through a season of menopause, paramenopause.And something to understand about my background as a coach is I have coached women to their long term weight loss through all of these things.And I wanna make sure I set, not disclaimer, but a palate cleanser for today, that everything I’m about to say here does not invalidate […0.5s] any health symptoms you’re experiencing.Whether that’s PCOS, menopause, anything else, this is not invalidating that is all valid, but based on the context on the experience I have gathered from coaching women to the results they want in the past decade, right, that is such a privilege I have.I want to share with you areas that will keep you stuck unnecessarily, and how you are making it harder now, because that’s why you’re here.You want it to feel easier, and you’re really wanting to see where you’re keeping yourself stuck, and what will happen is this belief that it will be harder for you, will make weight loss a lot […0.5s] harder.In fact, I would offer […0.5s] as your coach, because if you’re here, haha, let’s just say I’m your coach in this moment together that it makes it hard in general, cause weight loss doesn’t need to be hard.All of the effort and, the burnout and the hustle we spend trying to lose weight comes from mental blocks we’re having.Weight loss is simple, and I wanna offer you that weight loss is even simple. It still gets to be simple even if you have circumstances that affect the rate of your weight loss. So weight loss can be simple and easeful, even if you have circumstances that come into play, like age, metabolism, […0.5s] menopause, whatever that might.And so I want us to establish that, and I’m gonna lay it all out today, so you understand exactly what’s keeping you stuck.But I wanna offer that you open up your mind, right to also mindset related things here that are keeping you stuck. It’s not just the physical circumstances of your body, so I want us to reflect, and this was the case for me, and it’s probably the case for you too.No shame. I want us to reflect […0.5s] where the thoughts coming up now, when it comes to a weight loss goal, where you think this probably isn’t gonna be easy for me, […0.5s] or this probably isn’t gonna work for me. I want you to look for where you are believing.This is probably going to be harder […0.6s] for me, […0.5s] because this is a thought that I can tell you, coaching hundreds of women around the world from different backgrounds, different health histories.That this thought is pretty universal. Our brain loves to offer up reasons why we can’t have the results we want. So for you, it’s gonna be really valuable to see where your brain is believing. This is probably gonna be harder for me, and I want you to also find What is the evidence that your brain has for you in terms of why weight loss is gonna be hard for you specifically?So a lot of the reasons sound like, well, I just have stubborn weight, I’m older, so it’s gonna be harder for me. I have the specific health symptom like PCOS, menopause, paranopause, my metabolism has just slowed down.It’s just gonna be slower for me. […0.5s] Remember, we are not invalidating any health circumstances or symptoms you’re having. What we’re doing right now is mining for the reasons your brain offers you for why it will be slower, why it will be more hard, why your weight loss is gonna require so much more effort.Because what I want you to see […0.6s] is, and it might be obvious to you right now. When I asked you to look for these reasons, notice how exhausted you already feel, haha, right, when we mine for the reasons why something’s gonna be hard for us, I want you to notice how you’re already tired. I feel exhausted even just talking you guys through that.Because, right, notice how emotionally exhausting it is to establish why something’s gonna be harder in our thoughts. We haven’t even taken action on something yet. And this is where a big concept when you understand emotions is that exhaustion is emotional, […0.6s] right?It is very tough to exhaust ourselves physically. That is an entirely different experience when we feel exhausted or depleted or burnt out. It’s because of how we’re handling our emotions and our thoughts.And a lot of you guys are exhausting yourselves emotionally with your weight loss before you even before you’re even taking action, simply because you’re having the thought.It’s gonna be so much harder for me now. Something we can do, especially as type a intellectual women, is we will take something that sounds like a fact, but it’s actually very emotionally exhausting. So an example of this is, well, this is gonna be slower for me because I am in menopause, right?So that phrase […0.5s] logically will feel sound, it will make sense. You will have evidence of that. Perhaps you will have seen studies, you will have heard stories, you will have, had all of this evidence in your mind that that is a factual statement.But not everything we say based on factual evidence is just fact. It’s not neutral. I want you to pay attention to how the thoughts you’re reciting about weight loss make you feel.How does it make you feel to think that because of some circumstance that’s going on, your weight loss is gonna be slower, that, no pun intended, carries weight. It matters how you are emotionally fueling yourself with your weight loss, what your relationship to it is.And there is going to be no value in providing more and more evidence that your weight loss is going to be harder.It is gonna hold you back, it is gonna exhaust you ahead of time and notice how it might even feel exhausting right now, how discouraging, how depleting. And this doesn’t mean we need to lie to ourselves.It just means we need to steward the thoughts that we are constantly entertaining throughout our days.Because this is gonna pull you right out of responsibility with your weight loss result. Because now […0.5s] you’ve handed the weight loss results unintentionally to your biology, your symptoms, what’s going on with you.And you think it’s gonna take so much more work, which of course, then you don’t make it a priority because you don’t wanna burn yourself out. That’s real. That’s coming from a really sound place.And I want you to understand that there is a difference between understanding where your body is at circumstantially […0.6s] and spiraling into pity because you don’t like the position your body is in.So we can acknowledge that the timeline of weight loss might look different because we have certain health symptoms. But that is separate from feeling pity and discouragement and depletion because that’s a possibility.One keeps you in agency and responsibility where you acknowledge the needs of your body. The other is gonna keep you stuck and in that more child mentality. And if you’re new here, I do term, parts of our brain as personas.It’s not to infantilize us or to judge us, it’s just notice how there’s an adult way of seeing this. And then there’s that helpless child way of seeing this which we’re all gonna have. There’s no shame around this.And here’s what I see as the coach in my almost decade of doing this and this is something that is natural for us to come to coaching with.We’ll think, oh, I can’t lose weight because I’m in menopause, right? My metabolism is shot after I had kids, so that’s gonna for sure be why I don’t lose weight. Or, I have just always struggled with really high cravings.That’s even a thing people come to me with and assume […0.5s] that that’s gonna be the reason why they don’t succeed.Now here’s the thing to understand, and this is something that takes time to humble ourselves with as very intellectual women. Even though your excuses look more logical for not losing weight, they are still excuses. And they’re more sneaky because they present as logical to you. So I’m gonna explain what I mean.Let’s say you notice the thought I’m in menopause, so I can’t lose weight. To you, you will present that as very logically, and you will treat it as logic where you’re like, oh, yep, this isn’t a good time right now because I’m struggling with menopause now what you need to understand is that, this is an excuse because you absolutely can lose weight during menopause. This does not stop you from seeing results with the natural skills that you can adopt with healthy eating, healing your body and losing that weight.Will it affect the timeline of weight loss and the way in which your body loses weight? Sure, maybe I’ve coached many women who it doesn’t affect it really, and they’re surprised by that. I’ve coached women who it does affect the timeline and that’s okay.I have never coached someone where these health symptoms prevent their body from healing with the skills I teach. Your body doesn’t work this way. It wants you to be healthier, but certain health symptoms can affect that and notice how […0.7s] you’ll have a seemingly logical thought and I had this too.I’m right there with you. You might have a thought, well, I can’t lose weight because of my metabolism or menopause.This is just as big of an excuse and functionally as much of an excuse as us saying, well, I just don’t feel like it right now. I just don’t have enough time. I just don’t think I’m capable now as a high achiever. You probably don’t associate with thoughts like that quite as much. And if you do, that’s okay.It’s no different than actually having these types of excuses. Because functionally, it keeps you from taking responsibility and ownership over your result now.And the benefit of clients that have had health symptoms, like, menopause, PCOS, whatever it is, and have lost the weight is they had an opportunity to overcome their own excuses and to stop resigning their result to circumstances with their body.Because I want you to notice the emotional state of giving up your weight loss results before you even start.You have no evidence that you can’t lose weight during menopause, or, with the metabolism you have. And you just decide that it’s gonna be true, and you’re not gonna succeed now maybe you have tried to lose weight with these things, and it didn’t work for you.I would offer then that you didn’t focus on the right skills. This is the majority of my clients, right? If you have not Learned how to regulate your stress properly, heal your cravings before […0.6s] you start focusing on body cues, that strategy, you just had the wrong strategy. So definitely get inside my membership to learn that process.I will help you, but I want us to understand the posture where we’re emotionally resigning because of things that we’ve convinced ourselves, will prevent our weight loss, right? And this is just us […0.5s] not wanting to fail and take responsibility.So we pass it off to health symptoms like metabolism, age, menopause, things like that.And what you really need to start getting clear on is where pity will feel like truth to you, […0.5s] where we’ve normalized pity and helplessness as sounding logical. And we can trick everyone else, but I don’t want your brain to trick you.I want you to get really comfortable, lovingly calling yourself out without shame and saying, oh, I know this sounds logical right now, but this is emotional avoidance. I am avoiding taking action on losing weight in menopause because I’m avoiding the discouragement.I might feel […0.5s] that it takes longer, or I’m thinking it should be faster, right. That is where we step into adult emotional maturity when we realize that we’re actually just avoiding an emotional experience […0.5s] of taking responsibility. Does that make sense?And this is actually gonna be so freeing you guys, because it will allow you to see results so much more clearly when you take responsibility, taking responsibility doesn’t feel like punishment. It’s not shame, it’s relief because you’re acknowledging where you actually stand.And so when you actually tell the truth, I can prioritize weight loss even with my age, health symptoms, menopause, whatever it is, […0.6s] now you can face this result you want honestly. And now you can actually learn what’s gonna work for you, which is where everything starts to change.So sometimes what happens, which is very relatable, all coach climbs through this, and sometimes the thought will come up, right, cat, I just wanna be realistic about my results right now. I’m not being negative, I’m just telling the truth.I’ve tried so many things already and again, you guys, right, what they don’t realize in this moment is that they’re using logic as a shield to avoid emotional honesty.Because if they really sat with what’s going on, which they do, which is where the coaching goes into, right, they see that it’s actually the disappointment ahead of time that they might not meet their expectations with weight loss that maybe it’ll be slower.Maybe it’s the fear they’re avoiding that it won’t work out for them, and they don’t wanna prove it true, they’d rather pretend, like, they can’t do it. Maybe it’s the shame of, not wanting to prove that they won’t show up, right? That would be painful.And always if we’re making excuses for why we can’t lose weight, which this will present, then it’s just our brain avoiding and uncomfortable emotion. We all do this.I do this, you’re gonna do it. It’s totally okay, but I want you to avoid telling a seemingly logical story about why you can’t lose weight right now and reach your ideal body. I want you to avoid declaring […0.6s] facts that feel like facts to you where it’s just my age, it’s probably my genetics. I don’t think it’s in the cards for me. I think it, my body is in a place where it can’t happen.I feel so passionately about this because sometimes with the privileged perspective I have of coaching so many women, I wish I could somehow, give you guys access to the perspective I have and see that so many are out there […0.5s] creating the results you want with the same circumstances, with their body, that you have same age, same timeline of their life, right, with their symptoms and their metabolism. And they are creating the results that you want because they didn’t use this as an excuse. And I think this is a rite of passage everyone has to go through.So in no way do I want this feedback to come across harsh or judgmental. I’m on the same side of the table with you. […0.5s] So I really do get it. So here’s what we wanna understand, what this belief system of. It’s gonna be harder for me because of XYZ.What this does […0.7s] is first, it lowers your standards for yourself. It’s gonna put you in a position of disempowerment where you can’t do something now because of circumstances.This is not gonna feel good. It’s not gonna feel like you wanna be someone and see yourself as someone who takes responsibility, and who is resourceful and handles things. And it’s not gonna feel good to provide yourself excuses for why you can’t.So it’s gonna lower those standards, this belief system will also completely change how you show up to weight loss.So this is a problem my clients, kind of, deal with sometimes. And we guide them through that in the coaching, where they’ll show up with weight loss with certain symptoms, like age or whatever it is, and […0.5s] it will affect how they show up when they think it’s gonna be harder, cause they put one foot in the door, so they’ll, half try, they’ll dabble, they’ll, wait to see if it’s gonna work, because it feels very transactional in their mind. They’re like, well, I’ll do it if I know it’s gonna work for me.Cause they’re still living with this belief that it won’t because of their symptoms. So it’s affecting how they show up, also the biggest one […0.6s] […0.5s] is it prevents resourcefulness and problem solving.So if you’ve delegated your results to a health symptom, you’re not going to take full responsibility and see how could this work for me right now.What could I do better? You’re gonna assume that every stagnation on the scale or anything at all is from that symptom. You’re not gonna take responsibility and assume that it’s from the actions you’re taking.Almost always, you guys, if there is a woman I’m coaching who has, a health symptom like age or whatever it is, paranopause that could affect the weight loss.Watch how a setback will put them back into that victim mentality, cause they’re like, well, this must be why I’m not losing weight.No, it’s because as the coach, I know where they’re at, and their skill building, and nothing’s gone wrong. That’s just the skills they need to learn, and it’s because of how they’re taking action, […0.6s] right.So we wanna be careful, because this mentality can take us right out of control and responsibility for the result. And yes, if you are having circumstances with your body and trying to lose weight, it will be harder.I wanna offer you, it’s gonna be harder. But what if it’s not because of physiologically what’s going on? It’s because of the mindset you’re having about those circumstances, right. It’s gonna be harder because you’re believing it’s gonna be harder, and you’re having that victim mentality where it feels very helpless and debilitating. That’s what we need to get you over.It’s not necessarily the fact that the stakes are so high with whatever health symptoms you’re experiencing or wherever you’re at.So here’s what I’m not asking you to do. This is not my jam. I am not asking you to pretend […0.5s] that everything’s easy. I’m not asking you to ignore health symptoms you’re having. Those are important. I’m just asking you to stop using those circumstances against yourself, because instead of this is gonna be harder for me.You can lean into thoughts, like, my body might need something different.And I can learn what that is. This might take […0.5s] more intentionality and awareness for me, and I am capable of that. This version of me that I am in right now is still allowed to lose weight. That is something I’m still gonna provide her.So this is ownership, and I want you guys to notice how different this energy is. Then just gonna be harder for me.So I wanna close out today’s episode with an analogy. You all know how much I love those, and this is something I brought up with my membership clients, and it’s something that I think really […0.5s] allows us to see […0.5s] this mindset I’m referring to today.So, over Thanksgiving, a couple weeks before Thanksgiving, Taylor and I, my husband, we were traveling to Orlando to visit my parents and they live a few hours away from us. We’re in North Florida, right?So what happened is we had so what happened is what would normally have been a three hour drive turned into a five hour drive cause there was traffic, no big deal.But this analogy, this concept, I think relates to what we’re talking about here and I’ll explain why. So when we think about Apple Maps, right?Or Google Maps, whatever your vibe is, we can see how long a trip is gonna take. And then, you it kind you that a trip will take two hours longer cause there’s an accident or a delay on the road. And then you see that notification, right?So I want you to imagine […0.5s] this version of this happening. So I want you to imagine that you are on the road and it’s a three hour drive to your destination and you get the notification that there’s gonna be two extra hours on your trip.And I want you to imagine that your reaction to seeing that is you stop the car on the side of the road, you refuse to keep going, you wallow in pity, and you get out of the car.Okay, you say, this isn’t fair, I’m the only one, I can’t succeed because you see that there’s gonna be two extra hours added on to the trip.Now most importantly in this analogy, I think, is that there’s like of other cars still going with the same delay, but you might have an extra two hours, are just so overwhelmed with pity and discouragement.All right, […0.5s] so this is what’s happening. If it’s not obvious, when you notice a symptom with your body like age or metabolism or whatever, and you’re like, that might take me extra time and you’re so overwhelmed with your discouragement that you just stop going and you stop moving forward at all.And what I’m telling you with, you of my experience coaching is that there’s plenty of other people just going on the road continuing to the goal, cause […0.5s] what else do they have to lose, right?They still wanna get to their destination, so they just stay in the car and keep going, process the disappointment that there’s gonna be an extra two hours possibly […0.5s] and stay in the car to the destination.Here’s another example, right, maybe […0.6s] you see the traffic before you leave the house, so what was gonna be three hours now is five, and you decide not to leave the house at all. Okay, you really, wanna get to this destination, but you don’t even get in the car.So maybe the previous example would be you quitting the weight loss. You were on your way, but you quit once you realize that it’s gonna take longer. This is you not even starting the journey, this is you not even going all in at all, because you’re stewing in, like, and dismay that everything’s working against you and that it’s not gonna work.And I promise you, I hold you in the highest regard when I say this, because I have been there too. These are all natural mindsets of the brain, but I want us to picture this analogy and how it might be relating to your relationship to your weight loss now.Here’s what actually is going on, and what the reality of all of this is. Yeah, might have circumstances that will cause weight loss to take a little longer. You might have two hours extra […0.6s] on the journey to the destination. That’s valid. It can, kind for a minute.Okay, will be evidence for that sucking, haha, traffic might even clear by that time, which happens with a lot of my clients. So they’re not as affected as they think by the potential delay, but maybe there will be a delay. Here are two postures you have two choices.First posture you can have is, well, it took us two extra hours to get there for what was supposed to be a three hour trip.And that’s that […0.6s] or that’s only two. But there’s two types of postures you can have here. Okay, can think it took us two extra hours to get there, oh my gosh, that’s so terrible.It was supposed to be a three hour trip, you get to your destination, people are waiting for your, like, won’t believe this, it took us two extra hours.It was horrible, there was horrible traffic. Everyone’s like, oh my gosh, that’s horrible you were in your comfy car with the air conditioning, and you had to wait two extra hours. And I’m, not making fun of you, guys.I’m making fun of me because I would be the one to say, oh, that was horrible. Hey, traffic. Or we could have the version that says, oh, that was only two extra hours to get to a destination, that’s gonna affect the rest of my life. Who cares that it took two extra hours? Let’s just get in the car and keep going to get there as efficiently as possible.When we see there’s a two hour delay, cause here’s the thing, you guys, you’re not traveling to, um, friends or family on a one time trip. This is losing weight for the last time. This is healing your body. This is eating healthier where you never struggle with food again.This is changing your entire […0.5s] experience of your life. And you are not even starting or pulling over on the side of the road, because it might take you a couple extra hours to get there because of symptoms you’re experiencing.Now for a lot of you, you’ll realize, oh, the delay has already passed, traffic has already cleared up, and there isn’t even a delay.So you kept yourself stuck for nothing, but worst case scenario, you guys, yeah, have a two hour delay, […0.7s] who cares? You’re about to get somewhere that’s gonna affect the rest of your life. And so I hope that this allows you to see […0.6s] what we’re doing.When we don’t prioritize weight loss because of some type of symptom we’re having, because we’re having the belief.Well, it’s gonna be harder for me. On one end, it probably won’t be harder for you, but if it is, and there’s a two hour delay, who cares? Because you’re gonna get there, right? It doesn’t mean you’re not gonna get there.And I say this with so much love and understanding, because as you guys know, I am on the same side of the table as you. I have been there.Okay, there is no shame. If you have believed it’s gonna be harder for you. But from here on out, you get to decide will I use that belief to pity myself and to pull over on the side of the road or not get in the car at all to the destination, or will I use that to show up more deliberately, cause cause a timeline might be a little longer, doesn’t mean it’s gonna be super hard or impossible.It just means, yeah, might have to be really aware of these thoughts and have compassion and curiosity […0.5s] and have compassion when it feels a little hard, when traffic’s kind of pissing you off a little bit, that’s okay, understandable.But let’s also stay committed and getting where we want to go and that my friends, is fully within your control.I love you all so much. I hope that this provided you some value. I hope it called you out in a loving way that is always my goal here. And if you want ultimate support with this, make sure you get inside my membership at cat rentals com forward slash membership.This is where we just make it really easy for you. You get a process, you know what to do as soon as you come in. And if you identify as this intellectual woman who knows how smart you are, but you just want something that works with your weight loss and you want to get coached through it, that is gonna be the space for you. It’s so fun and we just have such a great community inside. So again, cat rent us dot com forward slash membership. Get inside. I love you all so much. And I will talk to you next week. […0.6s][…0.6s]